Getting Past No

19 Pages 4663 Words

of pushing our opponent toward an agreement, we need to do the opposite. Our job is to build a golden bridge across the chasm. Building a golden bridge means making it easier for our opponent to overcome the four common obstacles to agreement: it means actively involving him in devising a solution so that it becomes his idea, not just ours; it means satisfying his unmet interests; it means helping him save face; it means making the process of negotiation as easy as possible. (5) STEP FIVE: Make It Hard To Say No Bring Them To Their Senses, Not Their Knees Once our opponent still resists and thinks he can win without negotiation, our natural temptation is to abandon the problem-solving game and turn it to the power game. However, unless we have a decisive power advantage, the opponent usually resist and fight back. Even if we win the battle, we may lose the war. In the process we may destroy our relation with our opponent. And he will often find a way to renege or retaliate the next time he is in a better power position. Overcoming the power ...