Comparing And Competing

2 Pages 460 Words

When I was in elementary school, our classes would compete in sales of Christmas cards as a fundraiser for various equipment and supplies. The winning class received an ice cream party, and the student acquiring the most sales won a special award. Being quite competitive, I found myself challenged by a boy in another classroom. I worked very hard making phone calls to all my relatives, knocking on doors in my neighborhood, and even begging for sales at my church. “Marco’s” family, however, was affluent, and she didn’t have to exert much effort selling his cards. His parents just purchased the whole case of cards and that was the end of that. I took this as a personal affront and I began to compare myself to him and my family to his.

The next year, the big finale was a history contest in the library that showcased on the final contestants: Marco and me. I had great hopes that our class would win. Then I learned that Marco knew that father of Alexander the Great had only one eye and I had missed that. His intelligence loomed before me, merging with my already tainted image of his perfect little self and “financially privileged” family (as I thought of them).

As for me, I had become frustrated, discouraged, and depressed with the faulty images of my life I had accepted. I was uncertain about my future and whether or not I would ever amount to anything of value to anyone. I had worked so hard to win approval—to be like Marco—but I had failed, at least in my own heart. I just didn’t measure up to my own expectations. If I couldn’t be like him, then who was I?

Out of desperation I shared my struggles with my grandmother, Zorka. She told me that I did not have to be like anyone else on earth; that she loved me for who I was. She, also, said not to limit my possibilities by what I see in someone else's life or what others expect of me. The anger and bitterness began to melt away Gradually; I let go of compar...